blog again.

haay i'm bored. i'm itching to talk-text red.. in other words, babaan nnaman ang pride ko, YET AGAIN, para mgbati kami. pero ewan ko ba what he doesn't understand eh. para sakin, there is nothing wrong with having guy friends. pero sa kanya, ayaw nya. sa kanya, he sees na nanlalandi na daw ako, na may boyfriend na nga ako nghahanap pa akong iba, na boyfriend na nga ng bestfriend mo aagawin mo pa. parang.. HELO?! OK KA LANG?! grrrrrr. wala lang, this has been a never ending issue. ngalit xa dati na ngeemail kami ni nikole di anong gnawa kong para hindi na xa mgalit? hindi ko na ineemail si nikole. haay. lam nyo snsabi nya kpag nkkwento ko na may nkausap ako.. "hindi ka ba makuntento? bat ang dami mong hinahanap?" grrrr. nghhanap lang naman akong kaibigan ah! porket xa wlang mga kaibigan hindi naman ako ganun. eh kasi nman xa, may barkada naman un dun eh. kahit di nya nakkasama parati, at least andun lang un. eh ako? seryoso, wala akong kaibigan dito. AS IN. and know whats holding me back? para andito lang ako, walang mga labas labas para mkausap kami ni red. haay. saya ko noh. SAYA.

i had a dream..

wala lang share ko lang. hehe prang lungkot naman.


ano daw kasi.. di prang excited daw ako tatawag ako kay kat first time daw ever since nung umalis ako. tapos un tawag ako sa cell nya. eh diba kapag international calls, prang unknown number sa cellphone. di un. tapos sumagot si kat. tapos ang bati daw.. bsta hindi ako. jaurel daw haha. so binaba ko nlang. sad.

hahaha. wala lang share..>.< sad padin. wala. di ko pa nkkausap si red. xmas na halos. haay. wala akong mkausap. kaya... hello internet. hello tv. helo dvd. hehe wala lang, di ko na nggamit laway ko nga. ever. grrr.

Merry Christmas everyone.

whatever nalang haha.

haay. i am really not in the mood. wait. hindi ba yan opening sentence ko din the last post? haha. wala kita nyo na, wala tlaga haha it's been in my head na for days. i'm not online sa ragnarok. galing nga noh i didn't go to work, di din pla ako mgoonline. wala lang. hindi kami mgkasundo ni red. oohh joy. malandi daw ako eh. haha. saya. oh well.. WHATEVER.


i don't know where this "whatever" attitude came up. haay haay. and i know it's not good. wala lang, it's my way of brushing off kng msaktan ako, yoko mgpaaffect. kaya, whatever. haay. hindi ako pnapansin? ok cge whatever attitude ulit haha. it does work.. in a way. haay.


i had a dream kanina, forgot what it was about. oh right i remember na. ewan ko kng sino ksama ko bsta ngddrive daw, tapos npadaan kaming dasma village. cguro taga-CSA pa ko nun. anyway, sbi ko, dyan skul ko! tapos nglakad daw kami papasok.. ung ksama ko na not from there pinapasok. tapos ako, ang sabi, hindi na daw ako student dun. prang ano?! eto nga ID ko oh. tapos tingnan nung guard. may tiningnan sa listahan. pinunit. ouch. sabi ko waa anong problema. sabi nya, hindi ka na nga studyante dito. di pmasok na daw ako. nkita ko si ms pagtakhan. tapos tinanong ko, miss bat hindi na ako student daw sabi nung guard. ang sabi ni miss, iddrop na daw ako kasi hindi ako ngaattend ng school. prang ako ano?! tapos un iyak daw ako ng iyak ng iyak.
wala lang weird hehe. whatever.


haay i hate pride lam mo un. i hate it but i can't run away from it. why is it na ako ung nghhintay na pansinin ako ni kat? hehe bat hindi ako ung mgkusa kasi ako nman ung may gustong mkausap xa? oh well.. pride ang tawag dun. blah. i not mad at anybody don't get me wrong. it's just un nga haha nghhintay lang mpansin. hehe. sabi nga ni red kpag cguro ngganito ako, tumigil ka na nga sa arte mo. hehe maarte ako.

haay, i really miss..

hehe i just got off talking with red.. addict mode kami kasi hehe 3x eh which doesn't happen often. ang galing nga eh, when i slept 76 lang ako hehe pggising ko 80 na.^_^ anyway, wala lang.. even if mtagal na kami and all, i still feel the love.. lam mo un, alam ko na ung mga nrramdaman nya hehe. minsan, we say the same things.. true nga cguro ung telepathy hehe. i wish it was, so that he would know how much he means to me. lam mo un knina nga nung ngbbye na kami, wala i can't help but reminisce and be sad. sabi ko sa knya, lam mo beb sanay na akong sa isang side parati ng bed nkahiga hehe.. kasi when we embrace at mglakad, ganun.. bsta hehe long story. it's not obvious na miss ko xa noh? hehe wala lang, i really do, honestly.

i miss kat too.. i haven't been talking to her lately hehe wonder why? wala lang sometimes, ngoonline ako sa ym, and if you know me, that doesn't happen pretty often hehe. wala lang, just to see if she would notice. pero.. haha it's okay i guess... no big deal... hehe minsan i think, haay i miss the times when we were both boyfriend-less hehe. nung we weren't concerned about how we looked and nung wala, masaya hehe. sometimes i wonder, would kat still be the old running about, pinching and shrieking girl i knew from before? humm.. i don't know hehe. pero sabi nga ni kat, people change. maybe she still is that girl, except in high heels hehe.

BLAH.

i am not in the mood to blog lately. i don't know>.< yes i still work.. shet i got home almost 9 na today, ngencode ako ng mga codes for the new software ng company. o diba haha kala mo bigtime na noh haha wala i still get paid the same.

well as i said nga.. i haven't been in the mood lately.. ragnarok aus lang kasi red's there hehe. pero in any other way, hindi eh. uhmm.. ragnarok.. mayaman na kami medyo hehe. ang sweet hehe i thought red was only hunting for one crunch toast haha. i didn't even know what it was for eh.. tapos aww he made two para pareho kaming meron.^_^ hahaha ang cute nga namin astig hehe. pareho kaming nkalion hat and crunch toast^__^ hehe.^_^ grr maintenance pa.. after maintenance yes! 3x exp! haha. haay i'm pretty beat na. tired. but still, i'll wait for red hehe. i love him so much. miss him..

i passed?

hahaha. this is a very unappropriate time to blog.. nkatowel lang ako haha. yet i still blog. hehe i just checked kasi online for my grades and ung knakatakutan ko didn't happen nman pala.^_^ weee. kasi.. i forgot to submit one homework essay sa humanities and i'm scared na baka bumaba ung grade ko.. pero. aus na din.^_^ i got almost-straight Bs. hahahaha. cge na panget na B lang.. pero look on the bright side, edi unique ako wahahahah! mga kapatid kong smartypants straight As. di ako straight Bs o san ka pa hahaha.

eto grades ko..

anatomy and physiology I = B
humanities = B
intermediate algebra = A. hahahahaha.
psychology = B
composition I = B

i'm happy with it na.^_^ next semester nlang, bawi! /gg

red and i just got off from playing ragnarok.. and know what i plan to give him this xmas? haha. LOAD. haha prang ang impersonal noh? pero practical naman eh. well kasi, red only gets 150-200 pesos baon everyday. sorry na pero hard times eh. eh minus food and transpo pa dun. tapos ung natira, divide that between internet load, ragna load, cellphone load, and the occasional computer shop fees. huhu. so in a way, i'll take out the ragna load na hehe. bbili ako nung 500 peso load equivalent to 2 months oh dba di solve na xa.^_^ not everyone gets the chance to have money to spare kaya i'm just sharing diba. hahahha. saka conjugal property naman eh!^__^ wala lang sometimes i feel guilty too.. i get to buy whatever i want, pero xa hindi nga minsan kmkain just for us to talk. haay. i'm really lucky for red.. he loves me soo much.^_^ and i know that.^^ ang confident ko noh? pero that's how i feel.. i feel the love.^_^

shoot! shet.

grrrrrrrr know what time it is? yes it's 3:30 in the morning and you know what i've been up to? no, it's not studying. shit. sheett!!!!!!! i'm addicted again! argh! and it's all thanks to youtube! i love to hate you! grrrrrr!!!!!!!! i found the complete series of Full House. shet. and since i didn't get to really understand the story.. i only started watching before in the latter end na so jumbled ang idea ko of the story. shet. why now! finals week!!!!!!!!! shet. i hate it. i know, i'm bitten. i'm addicted. shet.


ahaha and instead of sleeping noh i blog about it? WHAT KIND OF PERSON AM I?!?! !

koreanovela fancy!

haha. kat reminded me of koreanovelas so i thought of looking for the songs i love haha.


FULLHOUSE
here's one with the koreans actors themselves hehe.. jessie and justin haha. i like jessie.^__^ they look so sweet.^^





STAINED GLASS
this isn't stained glass koreans i don't know who they are but this is the best i could find. there are those with eric santos singing, but what the heck.. i'd rather have these koreans.^_^ no pun intended hehe. uhmm.. mas uhmm, heartfelt? hahahaha. anyway. watch.





MEMORIES OF BALI
this is the funniest-WEIRDEST ending EVER. wahahahahha can't help but laugh at this once again!! we waited so long for this and poof! they became.. koko crunch! wahahahah.

missing.

haha. i just got home from school.. another test. oh well, it was algebra anyway so, no biggie. and we stopped by the gas station where i always buy hot choco and yum yum hehe am drinking it now.^^ haay.. cold weather, hot choco in tow, loungy bed, haay hehe there's just one piece missing-- RED.

i miss his hugs and his kisses, hahaha i even miss him pinching me till i get marks! i just miss being with him.
i miss it when he wouldn't be ashamed of holding my hand, putting his arms around me even with all the people around us..
i miss it when he'd wipe my pawis away with his hanky after we cross a busy road.. i miss it when he'd bring my things and act gay-ish hehe..
i miss it when we'd share that same hanky, as he's the clean one and i'm not hehe, he always has one..
i miss it when even though he's all sweaty and i have colds, he'd give that hanky to me first and let me blow my nose.. hehehe..
i miss his smell.. huhu..
i miss the carpet..
i miss it when we're at his house and his mom would want us to stay longer and she would tease him, when he would act annoyed with his mom and whisk me away hehe..
i miss it when he's not ashamed to cry when he feels bad, and make me cry as well..
i miss it when he'd smuggle texts even though he was still answering calls back when he was working..
i miss it when he'd tickle me, hehe until i'd pinch him to stop.. i miss it when we would just cuddle and watch tv..
i miss the times when we'd sneak out, and laugh at how we didn't get caught..
i miss the times when we'd spend almost all our money playing arcade games.. especially the house of the dead.. we had so much fun..
i miss it when he'd show me new things.. introduce me to things i haven't experienced before.. like making me eat different street foods and how he was so proud coz he wanted to make me taste what he has tasted before..
i miss it when we would walk home at night.. i miss it when we look up to the sky and trace the stars.. huhuhu.. i really miss this..
i miss it when huhuhu.. that last one made me tear up..T_T
i miss the times when it was summer last year.. huhu.. i miss it.. i miss it when we went to the park and he would tickle me so much that i was almost touching the ground.. he kept on tickling but he wouldn't let me fall..
i miss the time when he made me uto-uto.. haha he does that a lot.. one time he made me roll on the ground.. ground as in a football field, and also the floor.. but the uto-uto that i am, still followed hehe..
i miss it when, with one call, telling him to come because my dad just left.. he'd drop everything and go.. huhuhu..
i miss it all.. huhu.. i was so wrapped in his love.. and i didn't even notice it huhu. i know i've hurt him so much with me leaving him.. sometimes i feel his sadness when we chat.. i feel that sometimes he crys.. haay.. sometimes he would tell me.. "beb uwi ka na huhuhu..." and all i can do is to comfort him.. to make him feel better. haay i love him so much..

i've noticed that my past few posts have all been about red and i.. haha wala lang. nothing really interesting happens here. or would you want to hear about me cramming all morning to finish my homework? thought so haha. anyway.. i like blogging^_^ this is like.. a journal online.*well it is..* i used to have one where i write to red everyday.. it's still here.. but i've ceased to write in it. haha. i don't like to write in there anymore, well if you take out those i've written before. i started it when i boarded the airport to here.. it was when i couldn't call him and i was trying SO HARD. i was bawling in there but i didn't care.. i wanted to here him.. i was so frantic.. i couldn't call his house.. i couldn't reach his cell.. he didn't respond to my messages.. it was one of the low points of my life.. really. haha i don't ever want to recall that day. but still i am hehe. kat can attest to that.. as she was the last person i got to talk to before leaving. haha i was trying so hard not to cry on the phone.. i know i was. i had that high pitched voice and i was trying so hard not to cry. even though people started to stare. i didn't care. i was just so frantic. haay. i've been so sad then, and red too said that that day was first day in his life that he cried so hard. i couldn't imagine it. haay. i want to stop now.. i don't want to cry any longer. we're happy and this is just a way of recalling, of keeping that memory alive.^^ i know red will be a part of me forever.. whether we spend it together or not.. but hopefully naman diba?^^ haay.^__^ i don't know what i did to deserve this. all these trials, sadness, joy, fear.. all these emotions rolled into one. but then, i'd go through it all again, as long i have red by my side.^__^ i love you mahal...

happy, happy.^__^

well, it's been a long time since i've been truly happy.^_^ and i can say, this weekend has been, i don't know.. happier.^_^ hehe i've just said my goodbyes to red sa thor.. and it's like 10:40 in the morning there! break nya kasi from his first class and he ran to a computer shop to chat with me.^_^ hehehe xempre, who wouldn't feel good gawin ba naman sau un noh?^_^ hehe. i'm floating right now hehe, i'm happy.^_^ i don't want to look at other people's stuff nlang because, that's theirs. WE HAVE OUR OWN LIVES, and we're happy just as we are.^_^ anyway, a day to go till our 22nd monthsary.^_^ hehe i've mentioned this to red the other day and he too can't imagine na, wow ang tagal na natin.>.< we were like both, wooooww. hahahha! wala lang, that number seems short and long in a number of ways. short kasi, ang dami na naming npagdaanan na trials and fights and lambings tapos, ganun lang pala?? haha we've been through soo much, i mean SO MUCH, in our relationship.^_^ and to think, wala pa kayong two years?! hahaha.

long naman kasi.. helo 22 months?! it's kind of, rare to have something that long for our age.^_^ and as young as we are, ganito na kami ka-committed.^_^ this is really, rare.^_^ hehehe para na nga kaming mgasawa eh hahaha! just without the papers, and the blessing, and the children, and being with each other.. but who cares diba?^_^ i just love my beb.^_^

maybe my happiness can be connected na din with the luck we had in-game.^^ yeah, we get tired of it once in a while pero helo.. haha we got a rainfall this time!^__^ this weekend we got these stuff:

a. me- skel worker card. when i thought leveling up can't get any.. "better", aha! hehe luck!^_^

b. red- army hat from an OBB. which made me want to go and bust out the OBBs myself! baka swertehin eh hahaha!

c. red (again)- just today, got two pupa cards in less than an hour!! haha!! it was sheer luck! 2m each daw isa nun eh!! woohoo! i'm gonna get better clothing now! weehee!

d. well cge both of us na pero most of it was red- red has this BRILLIANT idea hahahah. i don't know where he heard of this or what, pero he had this plan./gg he made dozens of novices and each one did the tom yum goong quest! each thing/pot was worth 5k eh we made a merchant so more than 6k each. eh multiply that by let's say, 300 tom yum goongs?? weee nka-2m din kami!^__^ hahah at first i was all grumpy pa about it. i didn't understand eh! i thought i vvend nya which i thought was not good. so un sunod sunod lang ako haha. and in the end, ako pa ngssabi, gawin natin parati!!!^__^ hahahaha.

e. hehe one thing that also made me happy/laugh/something din in game was when i bought red a bucket hat! hahahaha. wala lang i saw that it was cheap eh and it looked like ung hat nya before nung myaman pa xa sa chaos hehe. anyway, so i bought it haha. sabi ko gift ko sa knya.^_^ aww.. well it's not a big thing but wala lang masaya hehe^__^. tapos ngaun lang, he gave me a ribbon. hahaha wala lang, suot ko din hehe.^_^

it's funny really how this game *ragnarok* can bring people together.^_^ I CAN'T BELIEVE I MET THIS GUY I LOVE IN THERE. haay. love moves in mysterious ways.^^ hehe. he can make me laugh out loud even though i can't hear his voice.^__^ you should hear me!! haha. i'm going crazy na.. i haven't felt happy in a long time.^_^ blooming kaya ako?^_^ hahahha. thank you ragnarok. you are heaven sent to us.^__^ you've brought two people searching for true love together. you've brought US together.^__^


i remember red and i would say this to each other before.. for richer or for poorer, in sickness or in health, till death do us part.. i love you.

awww..

wala lang. i was so excited to get into thor and spend a little more time with red. pero hindi nman ako mkapasok. kung kelan wala silang pasok. haay. parati nlang ang malas namin. as if hindi kami pingtatagpo. there was this one time pa, nghhintayan kami hehe ang weird. he was texting me pala, pero ung messages lahat bumagsak nung wala na, tapos na break ko. how unfortunate. grr.

i haven't been myself lately. feeling all down and i don't know.. anyway, 5 more days and red and i will be having our 22nd monthsary na hehe. sometimes i wonder, wow ang tagal na pala namin.. time seems to be flying so fast. haay we've been through so much already.. so many emotions have passed between us. anger, depression, loss, sadness, commitment, love.. so much love. it's hard to imagine that all of these happened during a span of less than two years. hehe. i want to fall all over for a thousand times. i miss my beb.. my babuy. hehe i know i can't be all lovey-dovey to him kasi, ayaw nya daw. he just becomes sad. so eto. i'll be lovey-dovey to him without him knowing about it. i'll be his babuy forever.. he'll be my babuy. that's what i'll call him even though he doesn't like it. hehe. i'll be rebelliously in love. i don't care hehe. i need to love and be loved in return. i love my beb..

mgtetelebabad ako sa knya./gg my dad has those cards at home na ewan ko kng gngamit so kkupit akong isa haha. or two? or three? haha bahala na! i'm just waiting for that time when i will be able to hear his voice again. the last time i talked to him was.. on his birthday. october 1. haay hehe i wish na mas mdalas kaming nkkapagusap. his yahoo voice doesn't work so out of the options na un. hehe snabi ko sa knya na sana he would call me naman, or write to me.. but he hasn't done so. anyway, hehe i don't want any gifts or what, i just want a letter. that's what i've been telling him dati pa.. na sana he would write naman. before i wrote to him often. pero ngaun, prang wala lang, not that i don't want to anymore, it's just prang di nman narereciprocate ung gngawa mo eh.. oh well. cge ssulat ako kasi mtagal na akong hindi ngssulat eh hehe. for christmas.^_^

eto na ang end ng rambling post na toh. wala lang. red didn't go online in ym. haay. sad. oh well.. next time cguro.. next time.. next time.. next time.. next time.. next time.. haay.

here's the damage.

ok, we just got home from shopping.>.<>.<) haha kasi nung una, i was leaning away.. mali kasi ung akala kong prices eh. un pala whoa! i should have bought more hehe. it was fun hehe.. my mom and i were laughing nung sa cash register na haha.. kasi we couldn't believe na ang dami naming nabili and un lang ung total ahha! my mom bought maybe more or less 20 items.. which included rubber shoes for yado, black shoes for enzo, 2 pairs of shoes for her, and a lot of clothes for them>.<>.< well, that may seem, "whoa!" na hehe pero take note, 20 items noh! hahaha..

ako naman.. i bought... 3 pairs of shoes, jeans, capris, hoop earrings (haha try ko lang first time hehe..), and a shirt(grr i should have bought more>.<). everything for 30 dollars..^_^ aus na noh hehehe..

anyway, i just wanted to report hehe. wala lang, shopping does make me feel better.^_^ hehe lalu na ung alam mong bargain at nkasave hehe mas mgandang feeling hehe. anyway, aun gising na si red.. ngtext na xa.. once plang. he only texts me once a day nlang.. oh well, i shouldn't complain.

oo nga pala, nguupload akong pics sa multiply ko hehe ung mga sa circus and stuff so check nyo nlnag hehe. sana maupload ko na coz third time ko na unulit and in some way, ngsstop. soo hehe wish me luck.

i'm still a nervous wreck/unromanced/unhappy person hahahaa. but shopping made me feel better if only for a few hours.^_^

New Post.

i couldn't think of anything to title this post kaya un nlang hehe. anyway.. long weekend na i'm beat. pero eto momy ko nkakita ng sale pa sa draryo soo.. shopping ulit>.<>.< anyway, last night, when we got home from lakeland, 3 hours away, aun nkalaro pa kami ni red. red can be the most un-romantic person in the world, which makes me sad kasi i love romance hehe, pero kgabi he said something na at least nkamelt ng puso ku hehe..


diane: *singing* hindi ka ba napapagod.. hindi ka ba nagsasawa.. sa ating mga tampuhan, wlang hangang ktapusan..

red: hindi

diane: anong hindi?? (not getting it yet)

red: hehe wala lang..

diane: *realizes* ahhh!! hehehe thanks beb...^___^


haay hehe that was one good part of it. anyway, ala lang, i get envious of those couples who don't think of the cost, the game, or whatever, ung isa't isa lang. haay hehe i got dissapointed kasi, sabi ni red.. nung ngbbye na kami, he'll text me, di un mdyo eexpect ako na pgkagising ko, may text sana. pero wala.. hehe ang sbi nya, hehe sayang eh.. hhintayin ko nlang kpag gising ka. aww.. in a way aus padin, he waited for me to really read it, pero sana iba padin un.

i feel really un-romanced lately haha. and sad, and lonely. pero oh well.. i have to be thankful padin in a way. i have someone whose still there, despite being really out of funds, despite the distance, despite the un-romancing attitude, and despite all the heartaches, trials, and everything. i shouldn't ask for more.. or should i?

Nakapagtataka.

Walang tigil ang gulo sa aking pag-iisip
mula ng tayo’y nagpasyang maghiwalay
nagpaalam pagkat hindi tayo bagay
nakapagtataka, ooh-wooh

Kung bakit ganito ang aking kapalaran
di ba ilang ulit ka ng nagpaalam bawat paalam ay puno ng iyakan
nakapagtataka, nakapagtataka

[refrain]
Hindi ka ba napapagod
o di kaya’y nagsasawa
sa ating mga tampuhan walang hanggang katapusan
napahid nang mga luha
damdamin at puso’y tigang
wala ng maibubuga
wala na akong maramdaman
kung tunay tayong nagmamahalan
ba’t di tayo magkasunduan, ooh.. oohh

Walang tigil ang ulan at nasaan ang araw
napa’no nang pag-ibig sa isa’t-isa
wala na bang nananatiling pag-asa
nakapagtataka, saan na napunta?

Hindi ka ba napapagod
o di kaya’y nagsasawa
sa ating mga tampuhan walang hanggang katapusan
napahid nang mga luha
damdamin at puso’y tigang
wala ng maibubuga
wala na akong maramdaman
kung tunay tayong nagmamahalan
ba’t di tayo magkasunduan, ooh.. oohh

Walang tigil ang ulan at nasaan ang araw
napa’no nang pag-ibig sa isa’t-isa
wala na bang nananatiling pag-asa
nakapagtataka, nakapagtataka

Hindi ka ba napapagod
o di kaya’y nagsasawa
sa ating mga tampuhan walang hanggang katapusan
napahid nang mga luha
damdamin at puso’y tigang
wala ng maibubuga
wala na akong maramdaman
napahid nang mga luha
damdamin at puso’y tigang
wala ng maibubuga
wala na, wala na akong maramdaman
kung tunay tayong nagmamahalan ba't di tayo magkasunduan

happy thanksgiving.

.. although for me, there's nothing really to thank/celebrate for. i'm terribly sad. but i don't show it haha. i don't want others affected with what i feel, not that i have that many i could confide in. i'm freely going to lakeland na, sa relatives namin for this weekend. bahala na what happens. haay i haven't texted red yet.. since this morning. paninindigan ko tlaga if that's what he wants. playing thor has not brought any good to our relationship. don't know why. haay.. i'll just go and eat leftover turkey. haha just posted, JUST BECAUSE. i'm terribly person-sick hehe. oh well.. di nga ako pmunta sa dun sa thanksgiving dinner dun ke tita lorreto.. didn't want to anyway. ala lang, maybe may text or something eh. oh well. i'm have ham and turkey.. good. maybe tomorrow will cheer me up haha. SALE. something to take my mind off the problem haha!!

i'm level 55 na in thor.. thanks to red hehe. the leveled more than half of that. thanks thanks. as if nman mbbasa nya haha. msama loob ko. here's an excerpt(>.<) from our altercation kanina.


diane: ano gusto mo kpag pmunta ako dyan itatali mo ko?
red: hindi. i'm not expecting naman anything from you.. i'm not expecting na ppunta ka.
diane: ah ganun pala o sige don't expect anything!!

wala.. it hurts.


P.S. to people out there reading this blog.. you know who you are.. pede favor?? can you just not mention this to me? i mean, don't make me feel better or worse or whatever. it's not that i don't appreciate the kindness and support, it's just that i don't want to talk anything about it. not now. i have a lot on my mind now.. thanks to me not talking all day. hahahah.


thank you, thank you for reading/commenting my posts. it's just nice when you here other people's thoughts on what you think. hehe dati kasi prang all i had to talk to was.. my head. hehe mga tanong ko and thoughts, utak/heart ko ngdedeliberate at sumasagot. it's just.. sad. it's sad to be alone talaga. i wish no one else feels like this. it's even sadder when you go online, wishing, hoping, PLEADING na sana andun ung ibang tao, and all you get is.. more sadness. this is where i pour out. this is my journal.


KUYA JAUREL, gmawa ka na ng blogger account mo nlang hehe. so that, i could make this my private blog.. just as ung ke kat. haha i just opened this kasi kat can't get into my blog dati. now i bet kat can get in.. right kat?? i mean, para kau lang ni kat nkkabasa hehe.

till here muna. am planning on sleeping early tonight.. i have to wake up early tomorrow. the stores open early.. about 5 am haha. unahan kasi sa mga stuff eh. well, wish me luck waking up! ahahhaa. basta final na.. SONY CYBERSHOT DSC-W50. haha i won't change my mind na.. hehe ang gulo ko kasi eh! anyway, I'LL DROWN MYSELF IN FOOD AND COKE NALANG! WISH ME LUCK!! TURKEY AND HAM, MAGTAGO NA KAYO!!!